I wanted to find the perfect St. Paddy’s Day leprechaun (an Irish lad of sorts) that I could toss back an icy cold one and discuss current events and come to find out my choice, Pat Robertson, isn’t exactly Irish and isn’t exactly a “Pat.”  In fact, he was born Marion Gordon Robertson, but adopted the name “Pat” (a nickname given to him by his brother) because he thought “Marion” sounded too effeminate and “Gordon” wasn’t to his liking either.

Oh well, such is my luck on this day of mischief, green beer, corn beef, cabbage and parades.  Pat Robertson was my first choice for a variety of reasons and so he shall remain my St. Patrick’s Day companion on this special holiday.

Many find Pat too much.  An evangelical–and not just any evangelical–but perhaps the most recognizable and influential of the lot.  He plays the role of preacher without the scary fire and brimstone and can be quite engaging.  To me, he embodies everything nutty and squirrelly about the Tea Party movement wrapped up and delivered with a neat little bow—with a glorious exception:  He cleverly crosses the political lines, knowing the power he wields, dropping little juicy tidbits of ideas defined mostly conservative until they move to just right of liberal and finally take a turn to just south of Tea Party crazy.

This past week he openly answered a silly question posed to him on the Christian Broadcasting Network (CBN) about oral sex and he set about answering it by patiently framing it around sin and what is in one’s heart.  When he was finished, the young lady questioning him looked relaxed and at ease with his response.  Pat is a genius. His answer deflects his crazy rantings about homosexuals and allows the world to believe he is genuinely in tune with his sexual being, unlike Santorum who has become the national pervert on all social sexual issues.

As a devout advocate of Christian dominionism (a belief that Christians have the right to rule), how does he go about bringing down Mormons without appearing to attack Romney?  He comes out for legalizing marijuana.  Brilliant.  Where Romney supports the tenets of Mormonism and stands personally against drinking and publicly against the legalization of weed, Pat comes off as the even keeled wise man as he does an aside about Jesus in a New York Times interview:  “I don’t think he was a teetotaler” and announces that he is in favor of legalizing marijuana.  A political bulls-eye?  You be the judge.  I am shouting hallelujah—not for Pat, per se, but for legalizing weed.  And that is what Pat is betting on.

It isn’t as if this octogenarian hasn’t had his problems.  Historically, his claims of faith healing,  doomsday predictions, attacks on feminism and the endless list of bat-shit crazy, off the wall ideas and quotes have made him infamous as well as famous.  But never underestimate the power of Pat.  Who could speak of legalizing marijuana on a Friday and chat about oral sex on a Sunday while presidential candidates seek his endorsement?

And who is Pat endorsing?  Well, in October of last year, he indicated that he wouldn’t be endorsing any candidate in the November 2012 election.  But as recently as January 2012, Pat told his audience on the 700 Club broadcast:

I think He showed me about the next president, but I’m not supposed to talk about that so I’ll leave you in the dark – probably just as well – but I think I know who it’s going to be.

Pat has confided in all of us that President Obama is not his choice.  Maybe after a few pints, he’ll tell his new blue squirrel friend.  I’ll be getting back to you when I find out.

And before I go, lest anyone be confused, I am not a Pat Robertson cheerleader.  I find his positions on just about every topic to be polar opposite to my own, including but not limited to, his opinions on women, gay marriage, homosexuals, religion, life, death and everything in between.